At this precise moment in time, in the span of the ages, I desperately want to be certain that the economy will not affect my education and that I will graduate in 2.5 years. I want to be as certain of this just as I am of water falling due to gravity. However, I cannot be assured of anything. The economy is beyond my control. As more and more businesses fail and people get laid off and the education system gets slammed, I realize more and more the implications of trusting in God. My only escape can be found in God, not anything that I can do. Sure I can try my best to give myself options for the future but if that is done outside of seeking God then they are worthless. To be quite open, that is something that I have been learning about over this past year. I will say that I am not the best in seeking God out first explicitly when facing challenging situations and I have been seeking God out to change that in my life. For real change to take place in a person's life, that person needs to be seeking God out daily, both in the Bible and in prayer. Going to church once a week does not cut it! Daily we are prone to sin, thus daily we need to go to God with that in mind and with our shortcomings before us. Pray against your weaknesses, not only once a day but at any time from when you are at peace to when the temptations come. My weakness lately has been uncertainty in the future, especially my education. However, I do not need to be anxious (Matthew 6:25) with what happens as I know God is in control of all things. My life is not my own (Jeremiah 10:23) as it was bought at a price. In that I am certain.

Invisible - Unseen. Unnoticed.

In life, how can a person be deemed "invisible"? I think the answer to that is simple as I believe myself to fall short in living out loud and being confident of who I am in Christ. In asking myself that question, I have no good answer to justify my actions these past years. While I have been doing specific things (Czech Republic, Slovakia, student ministries) with the time God has provided me, I believe to be fully effective with the time God has given me is to live with the mindset that God is not just restricted to my free time but to all of my time. At times I realize this but I don't take it to heart, I don't live it out in my daily life. So am I here to coast through this time in my life and just live for God on the weekends?....No! Christ never did such a thing as He was always about His Father's work when He started His ministry. Change is needed in my life in regards to that area.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.

- Romans 1:16

To succeed is at the very least to try even if failure is possible because even though failure could be a descriptor of the outcome, it can never be a descriptor of the experience or knowledge gained from such efforts.

I stand looking forward with hopeful expectations of things to come. I look on, eager to keep moving and gaining ground. Such beauty surrounds me from my lowly point of view. The path is not clearly marked. So many think that they know the way but who is to say that I'm heading in their direction. If I should end up at a different location than I intended, then so be it. I'll be alright with that as I will consider the journey worth it to have taken the risk to head towards the original destination. For learning is not about being content with what you comprehend but is the endeavor to understand what is not known. A successful journey is not void of risks, one of which is the choice to make that first step forward.

2008 has been quite monumental in my life in learning, growing, and understanding more about God. Things have been easy difficult during these past 12 months at different points. If I had known that things were going to be rough, would I have still endured them? Beyond all doubt I would have endured them and consequently learned from those experiences. Being comfortable is nice but what do I gain other than pleasure in my self. Rather, being willing to be stretched by God is worth all of the hardships that such experiences from this past summer, from school, and from life and friends. I look forward to much more learning, growing, and understanding this coming year as I have begun this past year to see and comprehend the value found in the humbling of one's own soul. And above all else, keep my focus on God.

The future is bright....