Rough-Hewn Servant

So this morning I found myself actually waking up early to go to a men's bible study group. Typically I do not do so well in a discussion setting as I cannot think of my own opinions quick enough or completely enough to really be worth anything, or at least that is what I think. So as it turns out, this morning turned out to be a discussion on being missional, what that means, and how that affects our lives/actions/conversations. Sadly, I became discouraged when my opinions were confronted. So naturally I ask myself, "Did I clearly communicate my thoughts?" Apparently not because it was taken in a way that I did not intend it to be taken but that is not the point of why I am bringing this up. The real question I should be asking is, "Why did I become discouraged? What are my motives for being here, for giving input?" To give input for the sake of getting a word in edge wise or saying something just because I can is misuse of what knowledge God has filled me with. So anything short of saying something that would give God the glory would be for selfish reasons. Again I ask myself another question, "What is my purpose for coming to this study?" Well, one reason is to grow in understanding while spending time in fellowship with other believers. The other reason is to ultimately be available to be used by God to speak into other people's lives should God lead me to do that. This though goes beyond just this study group because it is applicable to any where and any one we socialize with. Too often I limit myself by confining certain subjects to certain people/places. So I think I'll add that to the list of things I need to work on.