is yourself.

My friend is heading to the Czech Republic this summer and he needs some help raising the money to go. Clicking on the link will take you to his site where you can read up on all the details.

Czech Republic: "

"

Being at ASU for psych lab intro and half asleep looking at their sources of light I am inclined to ask 'how does this make you feel?'

One of the quirks that I have is the uncanny ability to notice the small details in the environment that I live (strictly city) to give me insight into my plans. For example, when I go to coffee shops (there are only 3 I go to on a regular basis), I do a quick scan of the parking lot looking for my friends autos to see if they might possibly be inside. Call me weird but it happens instinctively for me.

Another small detail I notice on a regular basis in regards to automobiles is that of the origins of peoples' license plates. Doesn't matter if I'm driving to school or am sitting as a passenger in a friends' car, I will always take note of where people have come from. For me, such references to distant locations stir up thoughts ranging from impersonal ones (wanting to travel there or thinking "that's a nice place") to very personal ones (to be brutally honest, of places or times or people that I do not want to come to mind). With a heavy heart I wish this wasn't so because it becomes all to easy to resent memories associated with said reminders. It is not my intentions to think both highly or negatively about the reflections brought about by subtle reminders in the details, but to look back with an eye of gratitude. Such recollections in reality with my thoughts removed are truly joyful moments of life lived with certain people in certain places at certain times. Unfortunately, I have issues removing my thoughts and emotions from past events. Oh that I would see the beauty of recollections and reflections on past memories, and value the lessons learned.

If there was one thing I wish I could be better at, it would be to notice the subtle and small details that abound within social interactions so as to better attend to peoples' needs.

This week marks the school semester's eve. As befitting of such a week, I went and saw James Cameron's Avatar movie in 3D at IMAX in the spirit of freedom that this week holds. What a film it was! One of the best movies I have seen in a long while. However, the focus of this post is not on the movie directly but rather on the thoughts and feelings of people after seeing such an epic film. I recently read an article delving into people's reactions after seeing the film and what was found was that a decent number of people were experiencing depression brought on by the portrayal of an alien utopia undefiled by its inhabitants. Apparently, many people walked away from Avatar longing for that utopia to exist rather than face work the next day or deal with another family crisis. Is it really the undefiled, mysterious environment that people longed for or something else? Perhaps the draw existed in the simplistic nature of the Na'vi people or Pandora... Or perhaps fans longed to be the hero or part of the winning team in the movie... What wrong did Cameron do in making this film? Nothing as far as I can see because as a film, the director strives to draw people into the film and make it feel as though the viewer is actually a part of the movie in some sense, and Avatar does just that. But at the end of it all, stuck when the movie ends, people find themselves struggling to give purpose to what they saw because on some level it connected with them. It gave them hope for something...but what?

Hope deferred from the gospel of Christ causes the heart to be anxious. Purpose is assigned elsewhere and thereby divorced of hope. Purpose and hope in the gospel must be found together or else a crisis is at hand.

Brothers together in Christ

Posted using ShareThis

2 weeks from today I will be officially done with my first semester of upper division nursing at Arizona State University.  This means that I will only have 3 more semesters to complete to graduate.  However, this has not come without a cost.  While time has always been at a premium for me, it has never been valued as much as it has been this semester.  The pattern is to fight for time, whether that is by making downtime more effective/efficient or by eliminating extraneous events from my life to the point that life is more manageable.  Certainly there are things that I wish could have been different but of what use is it now to hope on what has already been....a waste of time.  However, it was hard to justify spending time on things outside of classes, work, and most importantly the dynamic relationship I have with God.

With that said, I am sorry that I have not written at all on this blog but I hope to change that for future semester.  Speaking of the future, there are a few things that I'm excited for beyond the brick and mortar walls of the university...

1.  Urbana 2009
Being only 1.5 years out from graduation, the only thing I know of for sure is that I don't want to simply remain on U.S. soil for the rest of my life.  The purpose of attending this conference is to explore further my passion for wanting to provide something to those less fortunate all due to their location on this blue/brown sphere.  ...also, it wouldn't be such a bad thing for me to get out of town and refocus life.  I'm hoping that I'll be able to steal a close friend away from his wife so us guys can talk one-on-one.

2.  Mercy Ships
Stemming from #1, I have been intrigued by this organization and at this point I would love to pursue working with them in the near future at some point.  Currently the ship is docked off the coast of Benin.  What they do is provide medical treatments as well as health education to the poorest of the poor where ever they go in the world.  I hope that after gaining experience for a few years in a hospital it will work out to join with Mercy Ships for a year.  Much of my interest has been sparked by Ali's blog (a nurse on the Africa Mercy).

3.  VI - Monday Night Living Room
God has been moving in the members of this group and has been challenging different people to grow in different ways.  I'm excited to be a part of it and I eagerly look forward to continuing with this group into the next semester.  What is difficult for me, and bothers me, is that it is extremely hard with my schedule to invest time into all the guys I want to spend time with and challenge.  Any time I get with the guys in the group I just savor (more so than the coffee of the coffee shop we are in). 

A few days since the airplane landed at Sky Harbor and most of the effects of jet lag have worn off. However, the memories garnered have not been so easily wiped away. The same could be said for the memories from summer '06 and summer '08 too. What we experience in person leaves a lasting impression upon us that goes deeper than superficial to affect the core of who we are. In such a way, who I am has been changed by what I have gone through in these outreaches to the Czech Republic and Poland.

In coming back from this summer, I could not shake the feeling that the time spent this summer in the Czech Republic, Slovakia, and Poland would be the last time for many years. In many ways, the past 3 weeks were more like an extended goodbye than anything else.

Goodbye Poland Team. All of us will part ways at some point.

Goodbye Poland. I only knew you for 8 amazing days.

Goodbye Slovakia. You were a great end to 2008.

Goodbye České Budějovice. You were the town that started it all in 2006.

Goodbye Strakonice. You were my home away from home in 2008.

Goodbye Czech Republic. You will always be in my heart.

I have met many people over the years in many towns across the Czech Republic, Slovakia, and Poland who have been an integral part of the changes that occurred in myself. Of those people who have affected me, I hope to remain in close contact with some of them in the coming years....even if I am unable to visit in person. For those who call their home the Czech Republic, Slovakia, or Poland, you will always have a friend in Arizona. Stay in touch my dear friends!

Goodbye....for now

http://poland09.posterous.com/

The Poland team has made it safely to the H2O project work site and have settled in. The only small thing to worry about is a ton of mosquitoes and as well as a lot of spiders. In fact, I have a spider that makes a web across the door frame of my cabin each night so I need to remember to duck upon leaving or entering. In a few short hours the work will begin and our tasks will be defined. I will put up another post tonight or tomorrow describing our work better (need to wait to actually experience it before I write about it). Also, we are working alongside two teams, one from Belfast, Ireland and the other a team of Polish youth from a nearby city. This week is going to be good. We have a lot of work to get done, but I know this team is up for the challenge.

It is the 31st of July and I am back in Prague. Yesterday was so bittersweet. Today is even worse as I have time to think about yesterday. Spending time in Strakonice and České Budějovice was so good. I look to the horizon in hopes of seeing my self back here but all that is ahead is haze and what dim shapes of the landscape that pokes through does not seem familiar.

While I was here though I tried to make the most of it. From cooking a true Mexican style dish to going to concerts (punk rock at one, folk music at another), I would say the time I spent with friends from past English camps was well spent. Even went to Obi once (Czech version of Home Depot, orange color included) to get some last minute supplies for the work I'll be doing in Poland in the coming days. Also spent a couple of hours one night at a tea house which had seating on the rook akin to a Japanese garden (or at least that was what I think they were going for). The sweetest times however, came from the small hang outs at cafes or the long walks back to the flat. If only it were easy to hold on to such moments and make them last.

I hope to return sometime in the future and I'm sure I will, but the question is "When?"....

I have seem some of what good this visit to Strakonice has brought but if there is more, then I suspect that I will never know to what extent it has meant to the few people I have interacted with. If anything, I would hope that my time in the Czech Republic this summer is more valuable to others than it is for me. At this moment I have a few slim hours to rest and relax, alone with my thoughts....which is something I have been craving, not feeling as though I have to be doing something with someone. It is moments like these that I treasure.


In a few short hours I will take a train to Ceske Budejovice (from Pisek) and spend time with a few more friends from two different summers. This I will treasure too, just in a different way. I feel as though my time in the Czech Republic is coming to a close, not in reference to this week, but in reference to the coming years. So the time I spend with those students from camp who I have grown close to means a lot to me.

So I just found out a few days ago that the poland team had a blog. The web address is http://poland09.posterous.com. Keep tabs on that site in addition to here!

Its interesting. Walking...actually more so flying home last summer, I was expecting to be unable to come back to the Czech Republic this summer. Yet here I am. This time around I am not doing an English camp or an internship with Josiah Venture in CZ, but rather a work project in Poland starting a week and a half from now. However, that does not define what I am currently doing in CZ. Much of the time I have been asking myself why I am here. The surface answer is that I wanted to hang out with people I know here from camps and visit. Maybe encourage them in someway. The deeper answer is still unknown. What does God want me here for? I am sure there must be some reason. Deep in side, I feel a part of myself saying that this will be the last time for a long time.

I do not know what to make of that...

....only God in His timing will tell.

For His invisible attributes, namely, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse.

I feel at times that I am merely a foreigner in my home country. I dare to be different and thus am viewed as such. Being a college student actively seeking God and serving Him, I find that I do not have the time to watch TV or play video games for hours on end. It is possible that I could rearrange other priorities in my life to make room for the aforementioned entertainment but of what value would such an effort be to me? Christians need to move beyond the shallowness of the mire of entertainment and dive into deep and close relationships with those around us. Don't become complacent with the American dream of less work and more pay but instead go for the opposite. Work harder at your interactions with people, invest time into them. Do not take your relationships for granted. I know that in large, this is a "me" centered society in which we are conditioned through media, peers, and even our own flesh to seek after the things that bring the most benefit back ourselves while minimizing what those around us get. The intent of the flesh throughout the span of the creation has remained constant since the fall of humanity. Only by God's grace are we able to be freed from sin's bondage.

Let us make the most of the time that God has given us rather than wasting it on empty pursuits. We will never again live this day over.

This coming summer holds within its grasp many things to be treasured and remembered. On July 20 I will be leaving again for the Czech Republic, but this time I will also be going to Poland to work on the H2O project with a team from Grace Community Church. I am excited for this and look forward to the time I will get to spend with new college freshmen during that week of renovation work! Looking forward to next fall I am seeking to be more involved in the college group at church and may focus on the incoming freshmen for the next year!

However my heart still yearns to know about the unknowns of the next 2 years and the subsequent year following graduation. I really want to know the unknown but I must be content in God, which is one of the hardest things for me as I like to know what is going on around me. I need to have faith in God with where He is leading me as I know that He has a plan for my life. I need to trust Him in all that He does in my life.

.....this is so hard and I alone cannot not accomplish such a feat under my own power. God, you are my strength and my breath!

One thing that has been on my mind these past few months is that of the subject of suffering. This is not random by any means as these past few months have been quite difficult for me (in my eyes). I plan to make a post about what God has been teaching me but until I do that, I wanted to place a link to a sermon given by Mark Driscoll on suffering and how we are to live our lives during the midst of it. Enjoy!
Suffering to Serve

These past 4 weeks have found me in a state that no one ever wishes to be in: completely broken. Life is supposed to be filled with happiness and fun all while living in bold confidence of the path ahead of one's self, not with realizations that we are insignificant and that we live in total dependence upon God. I think not. I would argue that brokenness is needed, not just every now and then when we have done something wrong or feel guilty or convicted of something, but always. We need to be living with that realization in mind.

But like I was saying, we don't naturally like to be found in such a state, especially by those who know us well because we have an "image" to uphold. I am so guilty of this. So many times I have sought to keep my reputation intact by not being completely honest with those that are close to me and that has been a hindrance to my faith during my years in high school and carried over a bit into my college years. Over the course of my first few years of college, I began to open up to key people in my life, whose friendship I still cherish to this day. However, it was not until this past summer and up until now that I really began to get a grasp of this area of my faith in Christ. Still, I'm not perfect (I will never proclaim to be) and I am continuing to strive to grow in this area of openness. I have much to learn!

What I can say though is the freeing nature that exists in being transparent with your life is something to seek. As a body of believers, the church needs to come around its brothers and sisters in love to speak truth in to their lives yet filled with grace. All of us struggle with something, so we all need to be seeking out community in which support for it members is a integral part of life, not that people may continue in their sin, but that they may seek repentance and freedom from it. For what do we have to hide? We are all human and we all fail. Praise God for who He is; perfect, righteous, and holy!

For more thought, here's a blog post that speaks of brokenness in relation to leaders and provoked my thought on this subject tonight.

"Godly character is grown in dependency crises. You are forced to deal with God and with yourself. Great leaders don't just visit these places of dependence; they try to live there."

-Darrin Patrick

If one were to stand back and just observe someone (people watching, not stalking), it would become quite noticeable how multifaceted human beings really are. For each person, there are unique combinations of personality traits, characteristics, preferences, and dislikes that go into defining who someone is. Sure people are similar, but no one is exactly identical in how they process interactions and thoughts, which goes towards each person's uniqueness. Likewise, each person responds in their own way to different stimuli, whether that be something as simple as a touch or something as complex as a deep discussion over deep-seated feelings in combination with a dimly lit, romantic atmosphere. Looking at any relationship (friends, family, marital), knowing what gets through to the other person to show that you care about the relationship is key and vital to the health of the relationship.

Therefore, if I were to ask "What is it that your friends, family, or spouse enjoy? What can you do to uplift them?", would you know how to respond? How well do we really know those who we are close to? More often than not, we think about what we can do to make life better for ourselves rather than what we could be doing to make life better for someone else. I myself am not exempt from this. I believe that as a community of believers, Christ followers need to be exemplifying this in their lives towards people they know and those they do not know. In terms of personal relationships, one idea I have heard about is taking notes on what friends enjoy. Then through those notes one will know how to uplift their friend no matter what the circumstances may be. If is someone you don't know well, then small gestures of kindness can go a long way. I am not saying these things to only better your relationship with specific people, but to encourage you to live like Christ with your focus being placed on those around you rather than on yourself and your needs or wants. Seek to benefit other before yourself.

So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. - Matthew 7:12